your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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