Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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