Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
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