So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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