did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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