you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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