Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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