I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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