yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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