i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
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