I think i peed on brittanys purse
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize