I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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