They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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