he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
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She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
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come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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