I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
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You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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