man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
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She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
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i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
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