He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize