so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
we should paint friendship bongs
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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