I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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