erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
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Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
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We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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