Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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