I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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