well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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