I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize