I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize