My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize