I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize