At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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