THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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