Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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