SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
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He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
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I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
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