When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Randomize