It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Green mimosas i think yes
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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