I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize