your thong is hanging out like whoa
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Never joke about your clitoris.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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