Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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