you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
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