Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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