where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
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you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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