The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize