he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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