new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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