a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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