grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
