She announced her abortion via fbk
In America we eat man semen.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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