wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
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He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
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This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I have post one night stand depression
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