TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Houston, we have a blender
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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