im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
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