i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
my poor anus
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize