wat bout pragnant strippers??
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
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